


Pursuit of Happiness

by stripperbucky



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Drug Use, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, pot brownies are used
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-19 20:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17009028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stripperbucky/pseuds/stripperbucky
Summary: After witnessing your boyfriend Bucky’s struggle with anxiety, you take it upon yourself to help him by any means necessary.





	Pursuit of Happiness

Bucky Barnes was a different man now. No longer was he the same flashy, overconfident man that he used to be in the 1940’s. Instead, all that stood now was the giant puzzle that was his mind, which he desperately tried to put together again. 

The anxiety medication that his doctor had given him worked, but only for a short amount of time. Because of the serum coursing through his veins, medications rarely worked on him for long. You’ve had this idea for a few weeks now, but you were still in some inner turmoil when it came down to actually giving it a go. 

But seeing him toss and turn each night, unable to get the much needed rest he needed, or having to to hold him as he sobbed into your chest after another one of those terrible anxiety attacks he experienced every day was torture; both for you and him. You would give anything in your power for him to be at peace and he knew that. And honestly, it made him fall even harder for you. 

After many exhausting days and nights, you decided to give your idea a try. 

* * *

You told Bucky that you would be home from work a little later, which wasn’t unusual. Unbeknownst to him, you actually took off from work an hour early to meet an old friend of yours.

“Are you sure this isn’t too strong?” You ask, staring skeptically at the black haired woman in front of you. 

 “Y/N, it’s not crack, for god’s sake” She scoffed, pushing the small little bag closer to you. “I’d never do that to you or your precious  _Bucky._ ” 

“I know, I know, Jess,” you laughed, feeling your cheeks turn red. “I’m just checking!” 

Jessica rolled her eyes playfully before giving you a hug. “Have fun,” She whispered with a wink, before disappearing into the sea of New Yorkers. 

You watched her from your spot on the little bench you were seated on, hoping that you just made the right decision. 

* * *

You were seated on your shared bed, staring at the small bag in front of you. You trusted Jessica -really, you did _-_  but you were skeptical by nature. Especially when it came to Bucky.

 You sighed and rubbed your temples with your fingertips. It was worth a shot, right?  

“What’s wrong, doll?” You jumped slightly and looked at your boyfriend. Bucky was leaning against the door of the bedroom. He smiled softly, but you couldn’t ignore the dark circles under his eyes or the hidden exhaustion behind them. Even when he was suffering, he was still beautiful. 

You smiled and patted the bed beside you. “What’s in there?” He asked, sitting next to you.

“It’s something to help with the nightmares.” You reply, reaching in and pulling the small goodie out of the bag. The brownie was barely the size of your palm, but from what Jessica said, it was all he would need. Bucky cocked his head to the side as he stared at the brownie. 

“Isn’t sugar supposed to make you not-tired?” 

“It’s not just a regular brownie, Buck,” you unwrap it and place it in his metal hand. “It’s a pot brownie.” 

Bucky’s eyes shot back to you, widening in surprise. He expected another prescription, or hell, even alcohol. The last thing he expected was this. “You tryin’ to get me high, sugar?” He teased, smirking at you. 

You scoffed. “No, I’m trying to help my exhausted boyfriend feel better. That’s all.” He chuckled softly, staring back down at the brownie. You began to grow worried. The last thing you ever wanted to do was pressure him into doing something he wasn’t comfortable with, especially like this. Or make him feel like he was. 

“You don’t have to try it,” you blurt out. “If you’re not comfortable we can ju-” 

In one swift motion, Bucky took a giant bite out of the pastry. You gasped, your eyes widening twice their size as you stared at the crumbs in his hand. This is exactly what _wasn’t_  supposed to happen. 

“BUCKY BARNES!” You cried. But it was too late. With a sheepish grin, he swallowed. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked. You softly swatted his shoulder, making him laugh. 

“YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO EAT THAT MUCH!” You exclaimed. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He was only supposed to eat a quarter for today, then so on and so forth. You covered your face with your hands. Who knows what will happen now. 

“Oh, come on, doll,” He pulled your hands from your face and placed a kiss on your nose. “I’ll probably just sleep it off.“ 

You glared at him. Was this all just a joke to him? “What if it causes a panic attack?” He frowned. 

“Then you get Steve. I’m sure he won’t mind.” 

“And what do I tell him?” You ask. “Oh hey, Steve! I fed your friend some drugs and now he’s having a panic attack. Come help me?”

And he had the audacity to laugh. You swatted his arm again. 

“I’ll be fine, doll. Trust me!” He reached out his hand and cupped your cheek lovingly. No matter what he did, you could never stay mad at him. You trusted him more than anyone else in your life. 

 All you could do now was wait. 

* * *

You both ended up on the couch a while later and you were growing a tad bit concerned.

It had been forty minutes, yet Bucky was completely fine. You expected him to be completely passed out by now or panicking like crazy, but instead you got a normal Bucky, eating pretzels and watching first Harry Potter movie. Maybe Jessica’s brownie didn’t work on him. It wasn’t impossible, although it would suck. You’d have to come up with another way to help him. 

Life was hard sometimes.

Halfway through The Sorcerer’s Stone, Bucky began giggling out of nowhere. You barely heard it at first, as it only happened every few minutes. But when you did, it caught you off guard, as you mistook it for crying. But when you glanced over at him, you saw him slowly turning red with laughter. “

What’s so funny?” You ask, cracking a smile. That only made him laugh harder. He covered his mouth with the sleeve of his sweater, sinking into the cushions of the sofa. It has begun. His giggling turned into full on laughter. You had never seen him like before. Bucky laughed around you, yeah, but this? This was a  _whole_ other level. 

He was laughing at the stupidest things, like Ron Weasley’s scared face, or Professor Quirrell’s purple head wrap (which he said looked like a giant plum.) This was the best thing you’d ever seen. But what made him completely lose it was the three headed dog. Bucky was in tears. He was laughing so hard, he fell over; landing on you and sending the pretzels everywhere. You watched him the entire time with a grin. This was far better than what you expected. There was no screaming, no panic attacks, and especially, no psychotic Steve kicking the door down with a medical team. This was going great. 

 This was the Bucky you missed.

* * *

“Please?” He asked, staring at you with pleading eyes. 

“No, you just ate an entire pizza!” You exclaimed. 

“Y/N!” He whined, tugging your arm. “I’m starving!” 

With a sigh, you got up from the couch and headed into the kitchen. You knew that getting the munchies was a part of getting high, but  _Jesus._  Bucky had eaten an entire pizza by himself and yours, too. You were only able to get a couple slices before he all but inhaled what was left of it. On top of all that, he wanted a sandwich! 

Bucky was on the stool across from you giggling like an idiot at the cat videos that played in front of him. You couldn’t help but stop and stare at his actions. It made you wonder if it would help his nightmares. It seemed to be helping his panic attacks just fine, which was amazing. 

“Honey,” You say, leaning over the counter and poking his arm. He glanced over at you and smiled. “Have you felt anxious at all yet?” 

It takes him a few seconds, but you can see the wheels turning in his head as he processed your words. He shook his head. You felt your heart swell with joy. It had been a solid three hours now, which was really freaking good for his position. He usually experienced sudden flashbacks at unexpected times, sending him into a state of terror. But as you watched the way he contently watched the videos on your phone, you couldn’t help but tear up a bit. You rested your head on your hands as you watched your boyfriend eat his sandwich happily. 

 He was doing so much better.

* * *

“I’m really, really tired.” He murmured _,_ nuzzling into your chest. 

He shifted until he was lying on top of you, his head buried in the material of your shirt. It was the end of the movie now, Gryffindor had won the house cup and Bucky had long forgotten the movie. He peered up at you with hooded eyes, smiling contently. 

“How’re you feeling, Buck?” You ask. He hummed, pulling you closer into him. 

“M’sleepy.” You gently ran your fingers through his hair. 

“That tends to happen when you’re stoned, darling.” You assure him. But when before you could finish your sentence, his eyes were already closed and the only that’s audible besides the Harry Potter theme song is his soft snoring. 

You closed your eyes, making a mental note to thank the goddess that was Jessica, and also, get more of those brownies.


End file.
